Briluki’s Ruminations on Taxi Life

So there I am, minding my own business when this fool taps on my window.

“Take me to ***ter for £15″.   Not a question but a demand!

“Sorry” says I “But it costs more than £15 .

“I don’t care what your meter says, just take me there for £15!”

“No is the short answer”

“So you would rather just sit here doing nothing than earn £15?”

“I’d rather you paid the proper price for starters. Why should I do it for half?”

“Cause that’s all I’m prepared to pay”

“It’s a pleasant evening, I’m sure you’ll enjoy the walk”

“You have to take me ’cause it’s the law that you can’t refuse a fare from a taxi rank”

“It’s the law that I can’t refuse any REASONABLE fare and as you are not being reasonable I have the right to refuse you”

A hand reaches for the rear door handle … clunk goes the door lock!

“You have just locked me out!” he says indignantly.

“Very observant of you … you aren’t getting in and I ain’t taking you”

“OK Let me in and I’ll pay you what it says on the meter when we get to ***ter”

“Nice try …give me the £30 up front before I start”

“I’m not paying £30 … I’ll give you the £15 up front”

“I think we have been here before .. tell you what… give me the £15 and I’ll let you out when the meter reads the £15″

“Where will that be?”

“Less than half way.. but as I said… it’s a nice night for a walk”

“Your just being a smart ass”

“Yes, cause I’m not  drunk,  stuck 20 miles from home at 2 o’clock in the morning,  being bloody stupid and not wanting to pay his way. Although it’s been very nice talking to you… must go… work to do …bye”

And another plonker is seen in the rear view mirror!  Why oh why do we have to put up with these fools? Who lets them out without their carers?

Then later. Another one appears.

“I haven’t got any money left but will you take me home and I’ll pay you tomorrow”

Clunk goes the door locks!.

“How will you pay me tomorrow… are you going to be here again?”

“No … you can come to my house and get the money”

“So to get paid I will have to do two trips… are you going to pay for both?”

“No…I’ll pay you for the ride home”

“Bye”

Will they never learn to save the fare home? I suppose it was a choice between another drink or a ride home and the drink won.

And Another.

“Can I go to ***ford Drive but can you stop at the take-away while I get a kebab and chips?”

” As there is a queue it will probably take you half an hour to get your food and the meter will be running so it will cost about £12 while I wait,  on top of the fare home”

“What? You want to charge me while you just sit there waiting …. that’s not right…. can’t you start the meter after I get my food?”

“It don’t work that way… you hire me … I start meter … you finish with me … I stop meter … you pay what meter says… it’s quite simple otherwise you could hire me to bring you to town then ask me to wait to take you home again after your clubbing … I then get one fare per night. Why not just go and get your food first then get a taxi?”

“That means I have to walk to the take-away”

“Well it’s all of 100 yards … get your food first”

And so they go on and on and on. Can’t anyone just get in, go home and pay whats due ….what’s the problem? It’s not that hard. You don’t even need a degree to work it out!

Back on the job, looking at all the pis*heads and realising it is a full moon tonight … great … always trouble with a full moon.

Don’t ask why ’cause I don’t know how it happens but there are more fights, arguments and arrests during a full moon for some unexplained reason than any other night and tonight was no exception.

Lots of people getting very drunk and being total prats. One fare, boy and girl, both wanting to go to different addresses. Argument in back seat as to who should win the toss. After a few minutes I won! “To save you the trouble why don’t you both get out and pis* off as I don’t need this tonight.”

They were replaced by a very nice ‘bible thumper’ and that is not a subject you want to get me into. As he was sober I had to be polite and let him have his say but I drew the line when he asked me to church with him …. not too sure how he meant it either … he did have a very effeminate way about him! (Wonder if he was a priest?)

Our main rank takes ten cabs and in the space of those ten cabs there were three girls being sick and this was BEFORE midnight. There is nothing attractive in a girl bent over throwing up her insides all over her shoes, dribbling vomit on her chin with a half eaten kebab in her hand asking for a taxi home. The second word is “Off” !

Good ‘domestic’ taking place outside one pub. He wants to go clubbing and she wants to go home. From discussion to verbal abuse to violence in about two minutes and the usual police attendance to end their night. She went home bruised and he partied with the police in a nice warm van. Oh! the joys of a night out with the one you love!

Another good cabaret ! Two females having a slapping match and hair pulling contest while the men have a testosterone competition. Bloody police ruined it again before it got interesting. Wouldn’t it save a lot of time and money if we just had a large boxing ring these people were put in until they resolved their differences? No weapons and no rules!

Getting close to my going home now as they are about to release the last animals from the clubs. The ones that stay to the bitter end are usually the worst as they have had more to drink. I’m sure the clubs feed them raw meat then let them loose. Oh! look … here comes my decider … barely able to walk and being held up by a girl that looks like she has just beaten Terminator then did her make up with a slice of pizza …..I’m going to bed.

Been away for a while and doing things other than just taxiing. I have been working on my other websites, gardening, taking time out and even building a new garden shed/workshop. That was a job and a half! I chose a Yardmaster Metal shed (10 x 13) and decided to erect it by myself. The blurb says 2 men for 6 hours. That really equates to 1 man in 3 days!! Plus a further 2 days to remove the old workshop, cut down a tree and get rid of everything to leave a nice clean concrete base.
A useful tip for anyone building a Yardmaster …. DO NOT tighten any screws except those you will cover. Leave everything loose but fit ALL screws in ALL holes on EVERYTHING including the roof. Only tighten when the shed is complete! Leaving a slight ‘wobble’ lets you align the screw holes with an ice pick.

Shed started

New shed completed

©

Looks easy!

Any way, back to the taxi tonight and all my drunken fares to look forward to. Bank holiday was good and busy but I’m afraid it is back to normal now  and things can only get better I hope.

Update.

Just did another ‘ladies night’ and there were more blokes than ladies and even they were few and far between. For once there were no plonkers in my taxi and I didn’t have to get rid of food dribbles from the back seat.

Looks like things are getting worse not better!

Just thought I’d upload this as I found it amazing. Nothing more to say as this says it all by itself!!

Following on from my last post, I thought I’d just do a quickie about what I do as the taxi fares are drying up faster than camel pee!!

I got myself a laptop with a mobile ‘dongle’ that gives me access to the web for £10 per month. Now instead of watching movies all night I do a bit of studying. What do I study?? Well, it is all Internet Marketing which I thought was a waste of time once, but not any more ……. I’ve actually started making profit!!

How would you feel about an extra bit of cash while you wait for the next fare?

Would the equivalent of a few extra fares come in handy every month?

I’m into Affiliate Marketing at the moment with a fair smattering of Public Domain work. I’ve just sold a few copies of my own eBook ..not enough to retire yet but it’s a start and a good moral booster. How did I feel when I sold the first copy? Chuffed!! And a brighter light to shine on my way to not having to play with all the silly drunken fools in the taxi. One day I hope to be able to make this profitable enough to stay at home. The selling of my eBook has shown me it is possible AND with the few commissions I get from the affiliate marketing side, I’m on the right path!!

If you are interested, have a look at my ’sister’ site Best Marketing Courses. I have outlined some of the courses I have used….especially the public domain site ‘Public Domain Treasure Hunters‘. This is a superb membership site for all the public domain information you will ever need ….the main source for the eBook I have just been selling.

Anyway, enough of this ‘advertising’ …. just thought you might be in the same boat as me with fares dwindling and could do with a bit of extra income.

P.S. The new Quickfire Profits course is worth the gamble. If it doesn’t work out over 60 days you will get all your money back so you don’t loose out!!